The Ick: Why It’s Not Always a Bad Thing

woman getting ick on date

When you’re in the first stages of a relationship, it’s easy to be blinded by love. You don’t see any flaws in the other person and everything they do is adorable. 

This is why the beginning stages of a relationship are a magical time.

But if you’re starting a relationship and you’re already noticing a few things that your partner does or says that make you question if they’re the one for you, you might be getting the ick, and you shouldn’t ignore that.


sick emoji

What is It?

If you’re not new to the dating game, we’re sure you have heard about the phenomenon called ‘the ick.’ The ick is usually the thing that people try to avoid when they’re dating because it can cause relationships to end.

People can get the ick from all sorts of things, but the basic premise is something that you can’t move past because it becomes an immediate blocker in your relationship.

Getting the ick is vastly different from seeing a red flag. A red flag could mean that something or someone is dangerous or unhealthy, and you should get out of that relationship immediately. The ick is much less problematic but no less disruptive to a relationship. 

People can get the ick from how their date chews their food, the noises they make while working out, or even how they talk to their cats. There’s no one way to get the ick, and there’s no way of telling if something will give you the ick or not. 

But no matter what sets you off, once you get it for someone, you won’t want to pursue a relationship with them. 

Getting the ick can be a real bummer because it stops relationships from growing to their full potential. But when you’re online dating, getting the ick might be the best way to find your perfect person. 


thumbs up emoji

Perks of Getting the Ick

While we wouldn’t suggest that you go around looking for things that will give you the ick when you’re getting into a relationship, getting it can come in handy when trying to decide whether or not a relationship is worth pursuing. 

When you’re on a dating site, you’re searching for someone with whom you’ll get along for a while and someone who gives you butterflies and all of the good feelings. 

If you get turned off by every little thing that someone does or something as simple as how they wear their hair or what they sing in the shower, the relationship will likely not last.

Think of the ick as a potential warning sign that the relationship isn’t working out. 

While it’s possible to get it for someone when you’ve been in a relationship for a while, you’re more likely going to get the ick for someone that you don’t know too well. It’s a much bigger deal in the early stages of a relationship. 

You’ll know that you’re getting the ick for someone you’ve met on a dating site when you’re starting to lose interest in them or see their flaws clearly before you’ve even gotten a chance to get to know them. 

In that case, that’s a good sign that you’re not interested in them. You can save yourself a lot of time and energy by unmatching with them (and communicating why you’re not interested in them) instead of trying to brave it out and see the relationship through. 

Dating sites are not the place where you should go to settle. Instead, they’re where you can reach for the stars and enjoy all of the people and potential relationships you can make when you’re online. 


Celebrate It!

Again, we’re not telling you to look for it when you’re on a dating site or starting to date casually. Unfortunately, it will find you, and you’ll more than likely not be able to avoid it. 

But we also don’t want to frame it in a wholly negative light. There’s a lot we can learn from the things that give us the ick, and it does help narrow the dating pool down for us a bit when we’re looking for love online

People should start thinking about it as a way of gaining more clarity about someone before it’s too late. Listen to your head and heart when you begin to see little things that make you question if someone is worth it, and don’t waste your time on them. 

Instead, find someone online who doesn’t give you the ick because that relationship is more than likely going to last longer.

Scroll to Top