16 Ways to Show Love (Without Actually Saying “I Love You”)

Man showing he loves his partner by cooking for her

There are ways to show love to someone without having to tell them how you feel because love doesn’t always come through in words. 

Sometimes, you can show love through actions toward your partner. Remember, actions speak louder than words!

Demonstrating you love someone holds much more weight than simply uttering those three magical words. When you do something for someone, it takes more effort than to rattle off the words, “I love you.”

When you commit to specified acts to show love, the feeling lasts much longer and helps form better memories. When thinking about acts of love, people tend to hold those memories closest to their hearts the longest. 

Sadly, people always say, “I love you,” but don’t necessarily mean it. When someone shows them acts of love, people usually remember how that makes them feel more than if they said the words. 

Sure, your words can leave a footprint on the hearts of your loved ones, but your actions will have a more significant impact. 

1. Prepare a Feast

Even if you’re not Chef Gordon Ramsey in the kitchen, it doesn’t mean you can’t get in the kitchen and whip up their favorite meal. So what if it doesn’t happen on the first, second, or fifth try? It’s the thought that counts, right?

Even if you overcook the spaghetti and it’s a mushy mess, your partner won’t care because they’ll appreciate that you even tried to create a delicious homemade meal just for them. 

And here’s a secret: Don’t stress yourself out. If you detest cooking, as many people do, order from your partner’s favorite takeout. After a hard day of work, they’ll appreciate you taking the time to think about them in the first place.

2. Write Out a Secret Message

Let’s say your partner has an upcoming work trip. When they start packing their bags, you begin thinking about how much you will miss hanging out for the next few days. 

Of course, while they’re away, you want them to understand how much you’ll miss them, but you don’t know how to show them. You can call, but they may be busy, and you may not be able to reach them.

To remind your partner how much you love them, write them a short message and slip it between their packed clothing. They’ll find your little love note when they arrive at their hotel and start unpacking. 

They’ll feel your devotion, love, and bonus–it will brighten their day and make them smile. They’ll miss you as much as you miss them. 

3. What about a Back Massage?

No, not receiving a back massage. Try giving one. Your partner may have a physically draining job, so they would probably love nothing more than a relaxing massage from you. And not just any massage. Break out the special scented oils and rub them all over them from head to toe.

You can help relieve them of their aches and pains, but you also have a hidden agenda–you want a little fun of the sexual kind in the bedroom, and nothing gets them going like a deep tissue massage. 

4. Treat Your Partner Well

When your partner has had a difficult day at work or a tough week in school, sometimes it’s nice to remind them how hard they’re working and what an excellent job they’re doing. 

So, treat them out to dinner, or offer to rub their feet. Sometimes, they appreciate the small things the most after a challenging time.

If you can tell them that they’re doing a fantastic job and that you appreciate them for everything, they’ll appreciate you. Remember, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. You treat them well, and they’ll treat you well.

5. Listen and Validate

Listening may not seem like a big deal sometimes, but it can mean everything to your partner. Since life has many ups and downs, it’s good to allow your partner to have a sounding board to get some stress off their back with someone who actively listens to their issues. 

To validate your significant other, give a nod or ask questions regarding their issue. Doing so lets them know that you care. A simple “Is there anything I can do to help?” means a lot, so don’t hesitate to ask. 

You want to make sure you’re sincere when asking. Otherwise, offering assistance defeats the purpose.  

6. Give Kisses When You Come and Go

Want to start your day off right? Kiss your partner first thing in the morning before you leave for work. Or you can give them a smooch right as they walk through the door in the evening. It sends a warm message saying, “I’m sending you off properly to have a great day,” or “I’m so happy to see you home.”

If you really want to kick it up a notch or two, send them off or greet them from work with a sizzling, sexy tongue kiss. Doing so creates oxytocin, which is a love hormone, and increases the intimacy between the both of you. 

woman giving partner a kiss on the cheek while he is on his smartphone

7. Give a Random Act of Kindness

Every once in a while, do your partner a favor. Wash the clothes this weekend, or take the dog to the groomer. These random acts of kindness demonstrate the balance of giving and receiving and positively affect your relationship. 

When you do something gracious for your significant other, they’ll appreciate your kindness and be more inclined to return the favor when you need them. 

But that’s not why you’re doing it–you do it because you love them and want to see them happy. You’re also displaying affection, a significant factor in the cycle of giving and receiving. 

8. Stop and Take Time to Smell the Roses

Of course, we all get busy in our lives, and sometimes that can result in taking our partner for granted. We don’t mean to, but it happens. When you realize this, take some time to sit down with your partner and tell them all the things you appreciate about them. 

Sure, you’re busy, but you can spare two minutes to say, “Thank you for picking up the dry cleaning,” or “I appreciate you making dinner the other night.” 

It takes little time to show appreciation, and if you don’t show gratitude for your partner’s actions, be careful because somebody else will.

9. Listen to the Sound of Music

They’ve been obsessed with this band for years, so if their favorite group is coming to town this month, make sure your partner is sitting front and center. After all, would you deprive them if there’s a chance they can see and hear their favorite band live? Of course not! 

So, surprise them with tickets. If you really want to impress, put on your dancing shoes and boogie all night long. Show them that you, too, can hang with the best of ’em.

10. Send Flowers

If being romantic had a cheesy list, sending flowers would be in the top three. But have you ever seen a movie so bad that it turns into a classic cult film because it’s so cringe-worthy? Well, that’s like sending flowers–it’s so cheesy, yet still effective.

When you send flowers, it’s a term of endearment to let your partner know you still think about them. This works best as a random act instead of on a specific occasion like a holiday or birthday.

Personalize the bouquet with a flower she loves and include a beautifully written message on an attached card. The smell sensory of the flowers will trigger memories and emotions that will last a lifetime.  

11. Write a Poem

Before panicking, remember that penning a poem doesn’t mean you need to be Shakespeare. It simply means to put pen to paper and write down all your loving feelings toward them. Spill all your emotions onto the page and tell them how much you love and care for them.

Suppose poetry isn’t your thing, no worries. Write down, word-for-word, a romantic line from their favorite rom-com. If you’re unsure about that, jot down a romantic verse from their favorite song. If you want to present it in a special way, type up the words, print it out, and have it framed. They’ll appreciate the words AND your efforts.

12. Take a Hike

Want a healing and soothing way to show love? Take a long walk with your partner. Whether strolling on the beach, hand-in-hand or trekking through the busy city streets, you and your partner can partake in an easy-going, non-stressful conversation. 

13. Give Them a Surprise Date

Did you ever run down a list of things you and your partner could do but couldn’t decide, so you ended up sitting at home and watching television…again? 

Next time you want to show appreciation for your significant other, tell them you have a surprise date for them. Only give the details as needed, like what type of attire and time.

Then, whisk them off for a surprise evening of events. The best part for you is that you have total autonomy. The best part for them is that they don’t have the headache of deciding what to do because you’ve already done that part. All they need to do is to sit back and enjoy the ride.

You can’t miss because you know what your partner enjoys. For example, if they love animals, take them out for a day at the petting zoo. Or, consider a horseback riding adventure. 

What about bumper cars or an afternoon at the flea market? The idea is to take care of all the little details and surprise your partner with an activity they’ll love.  

14. Make a Little Breakfast in Bed

What’s better than waking up in the morning with the smell of bacon and coffee wafting through the air? How about that bacon and coffee being made especially for you? 

Pick a day when you both can sleep in, wake up early (not too early), brew a hot pot of coffee, and start scrambling those eggs. Add a few pieces of fresh fruit, and it’s perfect!

Many people skip breakfast; if your partner is one, it’s not a big deal. Make a fresh pot of coffee, get the O.J. and champagne ready for a mimosa, and cuddle underneath the covers for another hour or two. 

Man feeding partner breakfast in bed

15. Make Them #1 in Your Life

When you make your significant other a priority in your relationship, you make them feel good because it demonstrates how you feel about them without saying a single word. To keep your relationship functioning in a constructive, healthy manner, put them at the top of your list. 

16. Confide in Them

When you open up to your partner, you demonstrate trust in them. You let your partner in on your concerns, which signifies that you feel secure with them. It also helps to build up trust on a higher level, and that, in itself, indicates true love. 

Sometimes it can be scary to confide your deepest, darkest fears, but it takes a lot of courage, which your partner will appreciate.  


Of course, you love your partner, but it takes much more than simply saying, “I love you.” You must show love and take intentional actions to guarantee they understand your feelings. If you try some of these methods, you will have a happy and healthy relationship. 

However, if you’re still in the “looking for” phase. Try something new to you, like online dating sites, to find your perfect match. But remember, when you find your ideal person, you still have to make sure you keep them, so if you need to, refer back to this list. Happy Dating!

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