He’s hot. You’ve been watching him for the past two months, and he hasn’t even glanced in your direction. You’ve worn his favorite color–and you know what it is because you stalked him on social media, but he never commented. You even spent your last $200 on a perfume he mentioned once, but again, nothing.
So what are you doing wrong?
Love can change everything about your world, but should you let it change who you are? All you want is for him to notice you. Is that too much to ask?
If you want him to notice you, let him see who you really are with these simple techniques.
Relax and Have a Fun
When we try to get a guy’s attention, we are often worried about how we look and how they perceive us. However, a guy will be drawn to you when you’re relaxed and genuinely having fun.
Are you drawn to the scowling, miserable guy sitting in the corner? Probably not. You’d be more attracted to the guy laughing and joking with his friends.
Life is full of seriousness, and people want to find someone to have fun with. Not someone who they can commiserate with and complain. Think of it this way, when you are upset or angry, you want someone there to help pick you up, not keep you down with their bad attitude.
Stop Being the Attention Seeker
Ladies, sometimes we want his attention so badly we do attention-seeking things to get it. For example, have you ever been to a bar and watched girls kissing each other as guys stood around cheering? Most times, one or both girls are looking for attention from the guys and aren’t even into it. Actions like this will get his attention all right because it makes them look desperate.
Or, you walk past him several times or talk loudly when he’s around so he can hear about all the dates you’ve been on. Yeah, sure, he gets it–you’re hot. But is that the type of girl he wants?
You may have his attention, but it’s for all the wrong reasons.
Also, it’s perfectly fine to catch his eye by flashing a smile and then returning to the conversation with your friends. However, staring is weird and stalkerish. And don’t even think about winking at him.
Give Him Eye Contact
Nothing is sexier than flirty eye contact. However, there is a difference between eye contact and full-on staring. One is sexy, and the other may get you thrown in jail.
When making eye contact, you must do it for the right amount of time. Holding it too long becomes creepy and is a complete turnoff. But he may not even notice your signal if you don’t hold it long enough.
How long is the right amount of time? That’s a tricky question. The perfect amount of time depends on how comfortable you are, but as a general rule, 2 to 3 seconds is good, but nothing longer than that. You don’t want to appear too eager and overexcited, but you want him to know you are open to conversing. If all goes well and he looks interested, go in for the kill with a quick smile.
Walk Near Him
I once walked by a guy several times to get his attention. Later I found out he told his friends I smelled like onions. I had forgotten I had onion rings earlier. I did two things wrong.
- First, I walked past him several times.
- Secondly, I smelled like a bag of smelly onions.
Thanks to my first mistake, if he didn’t get a whiff after passing by once, he surely got it after I walked by the third and fourth times.
As mentioned, walking past him several times will give off a desperate vibe. However, walking past him once is a chill move. (Just remember not to eat onion rings first!)
When you walk by, act as though you have a purpose and are not simply strolling from one side of the room to the next. For example, if you work together and need to go to the kitchen, you must pass his desk to get there. Your purpose is getting to the kitchen to heat your food.
If you’re at the club, take the route near him to get to the bar for your drink. When you walk by him, do it like Emily Ratajkowski on the catwalk. Stand up straight and hold your head high. If you’re going to do it, give him something to watch.
Love Your Beauty
We’re human. There’s always something we don’t like about our looks. Our boobs are too small, our butt is too big, or maybe your poison is your wide hips. The problem with not liking something about our bodies is that it’s always the point of focus, and we spend countless hours and money attempting to hide or change it.
When I was younger, I used to think I was too tall. I towered over the boys, and they used to tease me about my height. To make myself shorter, I slouched. However, the only thing I accomplished was showing that I was insecure and embarrassed by my height, making the boys tease me even more.
Only years later, I began to embrace my height by walking tall. Then, when I walked into a room, everyone took notice. It’s not your height, the color of your hair, or any other superficial thing that makes guys notice. What they see is your confidence, and that’s what they’re attracted to.
Use Your Body Language
Sometimes, the best way for him to notice you is by using flirtatious body language. Flicking your hair or gently touching your neck are two examples of flirting using body language. If you’re with your friends at a bar, watch your posture by standing tall and confident.
When you fidget with your clothes, you appear nervous or insecure with your clothing choice, and guys can detect that. But, on the other hand, men always notice the girl who oozes sexuality and how she is more confident than the girl slumped in the corner with her head down.
If you feel anxious and unsure what to do with your hands, grab a drink from the bar. This will temporarily calm the fidgeting, but it’s only a temporary fix. You’ll need to build up your confidence for something more permanent.
Types of Flirtatious Body Language
- Head tossing
- Massaging the skin
- Coy smile
- Tone of voice
- Relaxed and open posture
- Excited demeanor
- Positivity
Make a Good Impression
Never judge a book by its cover. But we’re human, so, unfortunately, we do. So, make sure that the cover looks good.
For example, I desperately wanted to get this guy’s attention in college. He never noticed when I dressed in the latest fashions. Of course, the first time he noticed me was when I was coming off the track in an old, raggedy, torn T-shirt with my hair a mess and sweat dripping down my face. I was so mortified I practically crawled off the field in shame.
So, do first impressions count? Absolutely! And making the first impression only happens once, so be sure it’s a good one.
If you catch his eye and he comes up to you and wants to start a conversation, be friendly, smile, and even be a little flirty. Don’t get inside your head, thinking you have food in your teeth or crust in your eyes. That’s only going to make you less confident when talking to him.
Instead, be secure. He thinks you look good, or else he wouldn’t have come up to you.
When talking, don’t be overbearing and lead the conversation. He came up to you, so he wants to know all about you. Don’t be afraid to talk about yourself; allow him to talk, too. However, keep the conversation light. Steer clear of negativity, including gossip and complaining about how bad the bar service is or how you hate your boss. This will turn him off and make him second guess crossing the room to talk to you.
Be at the Right Place at the Right Time
For him to notice you, he needs to see you. So, for example, if you know where he hangs out, pop by sometimes.
Does he like to hang out at the gym? Since you’ve been looking to start working out, that’s the perfect spot to run into him. You know he goes to a specific bar every Friday night to check out his favorite band. So show up one Friday night and bump into him at the bar. If he hangs around or flirts, he’s interested.
Be Positive
Health Benefits of Being Positive
- Lower rate of depression
- Increased lifespan
- Greater resistance to illness
- Better physical and psychological well-being
- Reduced risk of death from cancer
- Reduced risk of death from respiratory disease
- Better coping skills during hardships
It’s Also Believed That Optimistic People
- Tend to live healthier lifestyles
- Get more physical activity
- Don’t smoke
- Follow a healthier diet
- Drink less alcohol
Be Interesting
Interesting people always attract other people’s attention, mainly because humans have a natural urge to know more about someone intriguing and engaging.
How do you be one of the interesting people? Do you have a strange hobby that’s not too bizarre? (ex, collecting men’s dirty sweat socks and keeping them in a jar.)
- If you have yet to climb Mt. Everest or walk on a bed of hot coals, talk about hobbies non-overachievers have, like collecting classic comic books. Did you swim with the pigs on your last vacation? Tell him all about that.
- If you can’t think of anything, talk about the funny thing that happened in the news yesterday. This demonstrates that you are up-to-date on current events and have a sense of humor.
When I was in college, when I wanted to impress a guy, I used to talk about how I accidentally gave my kickboxing coach a bloody nose. Guys found the story fascinating, and it prompted a conversation every time. Plus, I appeared like a tough girl who was into sports, which I liked.
Another attractive trait is playfulness. Being playful and spontaneity go hand-in-hand; most guys find it intriguing never to know what you’re going to do next. I had a co-worker who always told jokes, and everyday people, including guys, couldn’t wait for her to tell one of her jokes. She was playful but never to the point of being annoying. Her jokes made people feel good, and who doesn’t want to feel good?
Let Him Know What Makes You Special
You’re a catch for any guy, but you only want one. So to get him, show him exactly what makes you the G.O.A.T. (Greatest Of All Time.)
It’s nice that he finally noticed you, but unfortunately, men can notice a lot of women. It would help if you showed him what makes you stand out from the rest. Looking good is one thing, but plenty of beautiful women are out there. You need to go deeper. What is it that makes you unique?
Is it your confidence? Mention a crazy and wild experience that you’ve had. Do you spend your free time volunteering at the local homeless shelter? Tell him why you like doing that.
If your point of attraction is at work, show him your positive qualities by doing awesome work. He’ll be impressed by your independence and ambition. If he’s in your class, show him how smart you are by getting kick-ass grades.
3 Ways to Figure Out What Makes You Special
Your uniqueness makes you special because it’s what people relate to. However, sometimes it’s difficult for people to figure out what makes them unique. One of the best ways to figure it out is by asking a third party.
- Pay attention to the attribute other people point out to you – Think back to your job interviews. What did the interviewer state they liked about you? Maybe it was your positive demeanor or your extensive knowledge of a specific subject.
- Write out the things you love to do – What are some of the things you enjoy?For example, do you write poetry, or have you written a novel? What things have you done in your life that you enjoyed and made you feel good? For example, did you have fun throwing your friend a surprise birthday party? Was everyone impressed with how you organized the event?
- Ask your family and friends what they like about you – Your family and friends will always be honest with you, so ask them why they like hanging out with you. It may be your sense of humor or your insight on news subjects.
Find Something You Have in Common
Another way to get a guy’s attention is by looking for common ground. For example, maybe you like the same band, or you love watching sports. Don’t hesitate to cut in if you hear him talking about your favorite team. Likewise, if you both enjoy the same T.V. show, discuss what you think will happen in the next episode. Finding common ground is easy. You just need the confidence to act on it.
Getting his attention is more than just dressing and acting sexy. Don’t get me wrong, that definitely helps, but it goes much deeper than that. There are plenty of attractive women that can capture his attention. The saying, it’s what’s on the inside, is true. However, if you show him why you’re a good catch, he’ll be all yours.
